Scubed

Icon

Aspiring polymath since 1982

The Indian Trinity

A few weeks back I got my hands on a book that shook my perspective on how engaging non-fiction could be. That book happened to be Richard Rhodes‘ “Making of the Atomic Bomb“. A 900-odd page look into the genesis of the idea of the bomb and its actual birth in the parched womb of New Mexico as Trinity, the first atomic bomb to ever be set off on the face of the planet. Its a fascinating look also into the lives of the bombs’ midwives, from Teller, Oppenheimer, Szilard, and a host of others.

I have always been a fan of the genre called “historical reimagined fiction”, a genre that blurs the line between fiction and reality to an extent where you start accepting the author’s account of historical events and narratives. One of my favorite authors and series in this genre happens to be Neal Stephenson‘s “The Baroque Cycle” trilogy. Another favorite was Patrick O’Brian‘s “Master and Commander” series, starting from the eponymous book to the final one in the series.

To actually then read a work like “Making of the Atomic Bomb”, where you know that there is no line to be blurred, that what is actually being narrated is reality, transcribed and collated from thousands of hours of interviews and research, is to take a look into the mind of genius. I also happen to have Richard Rhodes’ book on writing called, well, “How To Write“, where he mentions taking five years to pen this work. If you were to take a look at the bibliography at the end of the book, you would have a pretty good picture of where those five years went.

I am yet to come across any work taking the erudition and detail present in Richard Rhodes’ work to the subject of the Indian nuclear-military-space complex. As an Indian, its a fascinating topic which few people have ever explored, in terms of matter for books as well as for personal exploration. For a newly-independent nation to develop a competent nuclear power and associated research sector, create a whole military complex based on the principle of self-sufficiency, and also setup a space research organization that is one of the cheapest space launch providers out there, is a laudable feat.

So where are the books then? Now, I’m aware that there are biographies/hagiographies of the people who fathered and sustained these complexes, people like Vikram Sarabhai, Homi Bhabha, APJ Abdul Kalam, MGK Menon and others. There obviously is a reason that most people have not read any of these (excepting numerous ones on Kalam that must have got publicity during his stint as President). Some reasons that come to mind are poor or dry writing, little or no publicity, and little or no availability.

I’ve gone ferreting around in some of the biggest bookstores in India but have yet to come across any book on this topic. There are one or two writen by foreign authors though but available only through Amazon. It’s sad that some of the most inventive and self-sufficient stories to come out of Independent India are out of sight and out of mind of the Indian public because there aren’t authors talented or interested enough to take this chapter in our nation’s history and convert into a compelling narrative that would interest readers of all ages and backgrounds.

Of course, a criticism that most people would aim at me for shortlisting Indian achievements in the nuclear, space and military sciences is that it totally neglects the work done by our agricultural scientists such as MS Swaminathan and supporters like C Subramaniam. What of the achievements of Indian scientists in radio astronomy, neutrino detection and other esoteric fields? In my defence, all I can say is that these are the three areas that I’ve followed closely and am most able to say something about which won’t be moronic. It’s times like these when I really wish I had the gift and more importantly the patience required to write.

Filed under: India, , ,

Eee, It’s My Eee Review

Sorry, I just could not resist that. Getting to the point, I have in my hands an Asus Eee PC that I have been using for the past two days. My office has just bought two of them for evaluation purposes so thought I’d do a quick evaluation to see if it really is worth buying as a laptop replacement or not.

The model I have is a black Asus Eee PC 4G laptop. Specs are standard and are as given below:

7 “800×480 TFT LCD screen

900Mhz Celeron Processor clocked down to 700

Intel GMA 900 graphics processor (shared memory)

4GB SSD Storage

512 MB RAM

It’s a really appealing laptop to hold. Light (weighing in at 920 grams), it’s easy to carry around with you from room to room, with absolutely no strain. The black finish also feels good with a very matte Thinkpad-like finish to the plastic enclosure. No worries about this laptop slipping through your fingers and disintegrating on the floor.

The Eee had come re-loaded with Linux, the Xandros distro going by the reviews on the net. Unfortunately, I’m not able to comment on the performance of Linux on this machine as my Sysadmin promptly replaced it with Windows XP.

With Windows XP and Microsoft Office Professional installed, there is just over 790MB usable space left. If you through Eee specific sites, then you will find that a lot of people have stripped down XP and Office to reduce the space taken on the laptop. Your mileage might vary.

I haven’t timed the boot up and shutdown times to gauge responsiveness. Let me just say that with 790MB of free space left, it’s still very snappy. Definitely far more than most Windows-based desktops/laptops that I have used. Microsoft Office opens pretty quickly, even Outlook, but I haven’t had the opportunity of using my GB-plus inbox to test though.

There are two standard resolutions for the desktop on the Eee, 800×480 (the standard) and 800×600 (conventional). With 800×600, the screen will scroll to accommodate the increased desktop and that can be slightly problematic especially when using the cramped keyboard and touchpad.

800×480 is a good compromise with Microsoft Office applications fitting neatly in the available screen space. Touchpad-based scrolling will be necessary for webpages though, especially news sites like the New York Times. Also, readability is slightly better at this resolution with crisper text and images.

Moving on to the keyboard. As is obvious in a laptop of this size, it is a big compromise in terms of writing efficiency and comfort. You can forget about touch-typing on this machine. The keys are cramped up together and it takes a good amount of time to get used to the layout. It’s possible to get used to the key size in some time, but what is really an irritant is the placement of keys.

Case in point is the right shift key, which is totally useless due to it being sized like a regular key and placed right above the cursor keys. Try pressing shift and you land up typing on some other end of your document. Another irritant is the space bar that is placed in such a manner that it cannot be accessed without pressing an Alt key accidentally, which again leads you, elsewhere from you document.

Otherwise though, the keys are good once when you get used to the layout, with good feedback and feel. Horribly dull looking though. For a laptop that is aimed at pure mobility, it would have been good if they could have provided a backlit keyboard that would have increased the usability in an appreciable manner.

Next few things that I would like to focus on are the gripes I have with the laptop.

One thing that really sticks out is the amount of space wasted around the display due to the speakers being placed there. I think this is one area that has been addressed in the Eee 900, the next version of the Asus Eee 4G that I am reviewing. Asus has increased the screen size to 8.9” by removing the speakers. I’m sure that the difference between usability on a 7” screen and a 8.9” screen will be significant.

Second gripe is the touchpad. It’s way too small and would have been better if it was a little wider. For a laptop where a significant amount of scrolling is required, it is surprising that Asus has not stolen a sheet out of Apple’s playbook and incorporated double-fingered scrolling in the touchpad. Less about the touchpad buttons the better. Suffice to say that they look and feel cheap.

Third gripe is the heat generated by it. You would not expect such a small laptop to generate as much heat as it actually does. For something aimed at mobility, it gets so hot at times that it’s unusable, on your lap or in your hand. I’m hoping hat this is an issue that will be addressed through adoption of Intel Atom processors as and when they become available.

I wish I could open up the laptop to see what kind of heatsink they have inside and also if its been pasted on properly. From what I gather online, it’s not an issue isolated to my unit. (Update: It seems that there is no heatsink per se, but there is a steel cover for the motherboard acting as one. No wonder.)

A niggling gripe is that there is no indication lights for the Lock keys, so if you have accidentally pressed the Caps Lock, Num Lock or Scroll Lock there is absolutely no way of knowing what you did till you start typing. How much money can Asus save by omitting three LEDs or is just a simple oversight?

Final gripe and one of the most important according to me is the case of the Eee. Since it is so light and also bottom-heavy, due to the placement of the battery at the back, it has an unfortunate tendency to tip over at little provocation (slight nudge to the screen for example). This can get really annoying especially when you’re in the middle of doing some work on it. It is also nearly impossible to use when it’s resting on a soft surface like a bed or sofa.

Coming back to the million-dollar question? Is the Eee worth buying as a secondary laptop? My answer to that would be an emphatic no. Unless you are using a 17” or 19” desktop replacement monstrosity as your primary laptop, you would be hard-pressed to make a logical case for buying an Eee. (But then, which gadget buying geek would qualify as being logical when it comes to gadgets)

Is it worth it as a desktop replacement or road-warrior laptop? Hmmm, slightly more difficult question. It all depends on whether you have big meaty fingers or not, whether weight is a very significant parameter in your choice, and whether you can live with the compromises of working with limited storage and no optical drive.

It is definitely not a laptop where you will be playing Half-Life 2 LAN parties but for the basic usage of accessing the web, using Office applications and listening to music or watching videos, it more than adequately meets the demands raised by the user.

At 18,000 rupees in India, it’s definitely not going to be an impulse buy for most, unlike the US where the Eee is available for less than USD 400. Also, unlike the US where Asus is targeting markets such as primary and secondary education, first-time computer users and parents, in India most of these markets are still very nascent.

Also in India, computer purchases are still driven by the “value” mentality rather than the “gadget” mentality. Even for me, making a laptop purchasing decision depends on a complete comparison of hardware in the market, and assessing the differential price that each brand name is commanding. It is very difficult for me to see how Asus will penetrate the Indian market in any effective manner or even expand the market to include first-time computer users.

Would I buy it? No. Not even if I had the money to spare. This is mainly because while the Asus Eee was a revolutionary way of thinking about portable computing and reducing hardware clutter to the basic minimum required to get the job done, it has also attracted a whole new batch of competitors into this market, most notable being the HP Mini-Note series.

As prices and hardware configurations start getting better, the Eee’s basic values of cheap and simple computing start to get more devalued. Therefore, while my vote is against the Asus Eee as a product, I would definitely vote for the new crop of ultra-mini laptops coming into the market. And we all have to thank Asus and the Eee for that.

Hopefully, I will be able to get my hands on the HP Mini-Note laptop for a review as well as comparison with the Asus Eee. Until then, some more links that might be of use to a person looking into getting an Eee:

By the way, this whole post was written using the Eee. It did take longer than my usual time but I’m sure that in some time typing speeds will even out. In all it was good fun, but I could not imagine using the Eee on a daily basis.

If you want some more information regarding the different ultra-mini laptops out there, head over to my earlier post on this topic called The New Ultra-Mini Revolution.

Filed under: Gadgets, , , , , , , ,

1001 Movies To See Before You Die

Seems like it is the season for lists. Another list that I came across courtesy Kottke, on the 1001 movies that you have to see before you die. Now, I do find this list a lot more dubious than that on books, because can there be honestly 1001 ‘great’ movies in the short span of time that cinema has been around as a medium? Anyways, the list is here for you to see.

Out of the list I have slogged my way through a grand total of 170, most of this done over the last four years. Now I begin to see where most of my time has been going. The movies I have seen are given below. Some changes were made to the list, and they can be seen here.

The Constant Gardener (2005)

Brokeback Mountain (2005)

Collateral (2004)

The Aviator (2004)

Million Dollar Baby (2004)

Sideways (2004)

Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)

Lost in Translation (2003)

Chicago (2002)

City of God (2002)

Gangs of New York (2002)

A.I.: Artificial Intelligence (2001)

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

Monsoon Wedding (2001)

Moulin Rouge (2001)

Amelie (2001)

O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000)

Memento (2000)

Traffic (2000)

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)

Requiem for a Dream (2000)

Amores Perros (2000)

Meet the Parents (2000)

Gladiator (2000)

Eyes Wide Shut (1999)

The Sixth Sense (1999)

The Matrix (1999)

Fight Club (1999)

Being John Malkovich (1999)

American Beauty (1999)

Audition (1999)

Three Kings (1999)

The Blair Witch Project (1999)

Ring (1998)

The Big Lebowski (1998)

The Thin Red Line (1998)

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998)

Run Lola Run (1998)

Saving Private Ryan (1998)

Titanic (1997)

L.A. Confidential (1997)

Trainspotting (1996)

The English Patient (1996)

Independence Day (1996)

Fargo (1996)

The Usual Suspects (1995)

Seven (1995)

Heat (1995)

Clueless (1995)

Braveheart (1995)

Babe (1995)

Toy Story (1995)

Casino (1995)

The Last Seduction (1994)

Pulp Fiction (1994)

The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Forrest Gump (1994)

Clerks (1994)

Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994)

The Lion King (1994)

Schindler’s List (1993)

Philadelphia (1993)

Jurassic Park (1993)

Reservoir Dogs (1992)

My Own Private Idaho (1991)

Thelma & Louise (1991)

Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)

The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Total Recall (1990)

Once Upon a Time in China (1991)

Edward Scissorhands (1990)

Pretty Woman (1990)

Dances with Wolves (1990)

Goodfellas (1990)

Batman (1989)

When Harry Met Sally (1989)

Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)

Rain Man (1988)

Die Hard (1988)

A Fish Called Wanda (1988)

The Naked Gun (1988)

Cinema Paradiso (1988)

The Untouchables (1987)

Good Morning, Vietnam (1987)

Top Gun (1986)

Platoon (1986)

Aliens (1986)

Brazil (1985)

Back to the Future (1985)

Out of Africa (1985)

A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

This Is Spinal Tap (1984)

Beverly Hills Cop (1984)

Ghostbusters (1984)

Amadeus (1984)

The Terminator (1984)

The Right Stuff (1983)

Koyaanisqatsi (1983)

Once Upon a Time in America (1983)

Scarface (1983)

Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi (1983)

The Big Chill (1983)

Blade Runner (1982)

The Evil Dead (1982)

Tootsie (1982)

Gandhi (1982)

Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1981)

E.T.: The Extra-Terestrial (1982)

Chariots of Fire (1981)

Airplane! (1980)

Raging Bull (1980)

Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)

Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back (1980)

Manhattan (1979)

Mad Max (1979)

Life of Brian (1979)

Apocalypse Now (1979)

Alien (1979)

Five Deadly Venoms (1978)

Annie Hall (1977)

Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977)

Star Wars (1977)

All the President’s Men (1976)

Rocky (1976)

Taxi Driver (1976)

Jaws (1975)

Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)

One Flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest (1975)

The Godfather Part II (1974)

The Exorcist (1973)

Papillon (1973)

Enter the Dragon (1973)

Solaris (1972)

The Godfather (1972)

The French Connection (1971)

Dirty Harry (1971)

A Clockwork Orange (1971)

Patton (1970)

M*A*S*H (1970)

Woodstock (1970)

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969)

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

Planet of the Apes (1968)

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly (1966)

The Sound of Music (1965)

Dr. Strangelove (1964)

My Fair Lady (1964)

To Kill a Mockingbird (1962)

The Manchurian Candidate (1962)

The Apartment (1960)

Spartacus (1960)

Psycho (1960)

Ben-Hur (1959)

North by Northwest (1959)

Vertigo (1958)

Gunfight at the O.K. Corral (1957)

The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)

12 Angry Men (1957)

The Man Who Knew Too Much (1956)

Rebel Without a Cause (1955)

The Seven Samurai (1954)

Seven Brides for Seven Brothers (1954)

From Here to Eternity (1953)

Rashomon (1950)

The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (1948)

The Bicycle Thief (1948)

Casablanca (1942)

How Green Was My Valley (1941)

Citizen Kane (1941)

The Grapes of Wrath (1940)

The obligatory links to other lists are below:

Filed under: Movies, , ,

1001 Books To Read Before You Die

I came across a post about a list of 1000 books that you have to read before you die on one of my daily stops on the Internet, Kottke. The full list is available here. Out of the 1001 books, I have read a total of 128. I have marked my favorites with an asterisk.

Some of the authors that I think I have egregiously missed out on reading are Ian McEwan, Philip Roth, JM Coetzee, Kazuo Ishiguro and Italo Calvino. Lots of reading to catch up on.

Life of Pi – Yann Martel

The Blind Assassin – Margaret Atwood *

Cryptonomicon – Neal Stephenson *

The Ground Beneath Her Feet – Salman Rushdie

The God of Small Things – Arundhati Roy

Underworld – Don DeLillo

Alias Grace – Margaret Atwood

The Moor’s Last Sigh – Salman Rushdie

A Fine Balance – Rohinton Mistry *

Captain Corelli’s Mandolin – Louis de Bernieres

The Shipping News – E. Annie Proulx *

Trainspotting – Irvine Welsh

The Robber Bride – Margaret Atwood

The English Patient – Michael Ondaatje

Foucault’s Pendulum – Umberto Eco

The Long Dark Teatime of the Soul – Douglas Adams

The Bonfire of the Vanities – Tom Wolfe

Watchmen – Alan Moore & David Gibbons *

Contact – Carl Sagan *

The Unbearable Lightness of Being – Milan Kundera

Neuromancer – William Gibson

Rabbit is Rich – John Updike

Midnight’s Children – Salman Rushdie

The Name of the Rose – Umberto Eco *

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams *

The World According to Garp – John Irving

Breakfast of Champions – Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

Gravity’s Rainbow – Thomas Pynchon

Rabbit Redux – John Updike

The Godfather – Mario Puzo

Cancer Ward – Aleksandr Isayevich Solzhenitsyn

2001: A Space Odyssey – Arthur C. Clarke

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? – Philip K. Dick

One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel García Márquez *

The Spy Who Came in from the Cold – John Le Carré

One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich – Aleksandr Isayevich Solzhenitsyn

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest – Ken Kesey *

A Clockwork Orange – Anthony Burgess

Franny and Zooey – J.D. Salinger

Catch-22 – Joseph Heller

To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee

Rabbit, Run – John Updike

The Lord of the Rings – J.R.R. Tolkien

The Talented Mr. Ripley – Patricia Highsmith

Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov

The Last Temptation of Christ – Nikos Kazantzákis *

Lord of the Flies – William Golding

Invisible Man – Ralph Ellison

The Old Man and the Sea – Ernest Hemingway *

Foundation – Isaac Asimov

The Catcher in the Rye – J.D. Salinger

The Rebel – Albert Camus

I, Robot – Isaac Asimov

Nineteen Eighty-Four – George Orwell

Animal Farm – George Orwell *

For Whom the Bell Tolls – Ernest Hemingway

The Grapes of Wrath – John Steinbeck

Rebecca – Daphne du Maurier

Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck

The Hobbit – J.R.R. Tolkien

Thank You, Jeeves – P.G. Wodehouse

Brave New World – Aldous Huxley

A Farewell to Arms – Ernest Hemingway

Lady Chatterley’s Lover – D.H. Lawrence

The Castle – Franz Kafka

The Great Gatsby – F. Scott Fitzgerald

Siddhartha – Herman Hesse

Tarzan of the Apes – Edgar Rice Burroughs

Nostromo – Joseph Conrad

Lord Jim – Joseph Conrad

Heart of Darkness – Joseph Conrad

The Hound of the Baskervilles – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Kim – Rudyard Kipling

The War of the Worlds – H.G. Wells

The Invisible Man – H.G. Wells

The Island of Dr. Moreau – H.G. Wells

The Time Machine – H.G. Wells

Dracula – Bram Stoker

Jude the Obscure – Thomas Hardy

The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Tess of the D’Urbervilles – Thomas Hardy

The Picture of Dorian Gray – Oscar Wilde

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde – Robert Louis Stevenson

The Mayor of Casterbridge – Thomas Hardy

Kidnapped – Robert Louis Stevenson

King Solomon’s Mines – H. Rider Haggard

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn – Mark Twain

Treasure Island – Robert Louis Stevenson

Anna Karenina – Leo Tolstoy

Far from the Madding Crowd – Thomas Hardy

Around the World in Eighty Days – Jules Verne

Erewhon – Samuel Butler

Through the Looking Glass, and What Alice Found There – Lewis Carroll

The Idiot – Fyodor Dostoevsky

War and Peace – Leo Tolstoy *

Journey to the Centre of the Earth – Jules Verne

Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoevsky

Les Misérables – Victor Hugo

Fathers and Sons – Ivan Turgenev *

Silas Marner – George Eliot

Great Expectations – Charles Dickens

The Mill on the Floss – George Eliot

A Tale of Two Cities – Charles Dickens

Madame Bovary – Gustave Flaubert

Walden – Henry David Thoreau

Bleak House – Charles Dickens

Moby-Dick – Herman Melville

David Copperfield – Charles Dickens

Wuthering Heights – Emily Brontë

Agnes Grey – Anne Brontë

Jane Eyre – Charlotte Brontë

The Count of Monte-Cristo – Alexandre Dumas

The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas

The Pit and the Pendulum – Edgar Allan Poe

Oliver Twist – Charles Dickens

The Hunchback of Notre Dame – Victor Hugo

Last of the Mohicans – James Fenimore Cooper

Ivanhoe – Sir Walter Scott

Emma – Jane Austen

Mansfield Park – Jane Austen

Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen

Sense and Sensibility – Jane Austen

Candide – Voltaire

Gulliver’s Travels – Jonathan Swift

Robinson Crusoe – Daniel Defoe

Don Quixote – Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra

The Thousand and One Nights – Anonymous

Aesop’s Fables – Aesopus

Some more “lists” to peruse if you have the time are:

Update: Came across another interesting list on Spread The Word. They have a list of 50 books under a shortlist for their 2009 “Books To Talk About” competition. You can see the full list here.

Filed under: Reading, , ,

Being Atheist

In today’s religious climate, its not very easy to rise up in front of a crowd of your peers and elders and have to state the uncomfortable fact (for them) that you do not believe in the things that they believe in, and that your belief system actually consists of an emphatic lack of belief in theirs. There are the usual exclamations about landing up in hell, wise elders shaking their heads and saying that its just a growing-up phase and that you will revert to believing in God again, just you wait and see. Scandalized aunts whispering loudly that that boy was always weird and different. Peers tittering or staring incredulously, as if your pronouncement was the verbal equivalent of a Girls Gone Wild (mildly NSFW) video.

argument-dismissal.png

Why is it so difficult for people to accept that there might be someone who does not believe in God and actually has very good reasons backing him up? Why does an atheist not only have to explain his belief (or lack of it) in front of everyone at every given opportunity, but also have to deal with people who think that their faith is being put to question by your lack of it? After all, we are all atheist in some way or the other. To paraphrase Richard Dawkins from his talk at TED, “If you ask someone who is a Christian if he believes in Allah, Vishnu or Odin, he would definitely say no. As atheists, we just go one god further”.

We don’t become atheist because its something that can get talked about at cocktail parties, or because its a laugh scandalizing people. We are atheists because that is the only frame of reference that explains and satisfies the recurrent question of who we are and where we belong.

As a person born and brought up in a mildly conservative Hindu family, its been a question that I have grappled with myself for a while. My interactions with the faith that I was in mostly consisted of weekly or monthly trips to the nearest temple and reading up on the works of well-known Hindu philosophers. The more I read, the more it struck me that even as Hindus, the belief systems and philosophies that they worked with had so much variation (as Hinduism lacks any dogma)

If there was so much variation in their beliefs, then the only logical conclusion I could arrive at was that all or nearly all of it had to come from a man-made source. That religion itself was a man-made construct, adapting and evolving itself to meet the requirements and needs of its adherents over the centuries of its existence. So if it was a man-made construct, then where could God arise out of, except from a blind devotion to the central dogma of his or her existence?

My realization was not a Hindu-specific realization, because if you were to examine any of the other major world religions you would seem the profligacy of man-made construct in their belief systems, their religious texts, their rituals and dogma. How else could any one explain the sheer proliferation of sects in stridently monotheistic religions such as Islam and Christianity?

The second realization that I arrived at was that religion needs unquestioning belief. That it brooks no questions and rarely, if ever, accepts speculation. Religion could never be like science, accepting nothing unless it had passed the gauntlet of academic scrutiny, empirical testing and validation. Even in economics, while there might not be a mathematical equivalent of 200805051210.jpg for the relationship between supply and demand, there is still a very clear and unambiguous correlation between the two. Religion has nothing of the like.

The third realization that I had which was to push me even farther, was the realization that science and religion are essentially antithetical to each other. As a person who was deeply interested in science and its questions, the sheer impossibility of any form of logical reconciliation between religion and science was something that made me realize that it had to be one or the other. That for me, there could not be an uneasy truce between the two like Human Genome Project director Francis Collins was able to arrive at very publicly, in his books as well as talks.

Like Pascal’s wager, I tried making my peace with the incoherence of organized religion and my growing lack of belief in a higher power by hiding behind the convenient skirts offered by agnosticism. And it did work for a while as long as I kept myself away from any discussion regarding religion or faith that would re-ignite the doubts all over again. I stifled any close-blasphemous verbalization regarding religion that came to my lips now and then. The surprise for me was how accepting people were of my agnosticism.

It was kind of like being treated as the befuddled aunt at a party who mixes everyones name up without any recognizance of her errors. Indulgent smiles from religious people who in their hearts would have been hoping that I would find God as long as it was their own. Nods of understanding from other agnostics who might have seen in me, a reflection of their own reconciliations and journeys. Things would have continued in this fashion if I did not make the decision last year that I could not be truly free till I acknowledged who I was, because otherwise I’d be living a lie that I really had no reason to continue living.

That realizing one thing and accepting it are two totally different things, is something that I have gained as an experience truly my own. Arriving at the conclusion that I could not in all conscience consider myself a part of the religious majority was easy. Making a clean break from religion and the comfort and security of its community was for me the most difficult part of my transition.

Starting off with irrational fear of uttering anything bordering on blasphemous, being tight-lipped about religious orientation or interest, avoidance of any discussion on religion or faith, the convenient subterfuge offered by agnosticism were all the different steps that I went through before arriving at the courage to publicly verbalize my atheism. A courage required for me to scale the barriers raised in my mind and psyche by my upbringing in religion rather than the courage required to face the public eye.

atheist-pr-problem.png

This post of mine is not raise questions in the eyes of people who do profess a faith in God and/or religion. The purpose is basically to chronicle in a small way the journey I undertook to the port of call where I’m right now. There are atheists out there who propound that all atheists should be out there proselytizing the truth about atheism, the irrational belief of God and the corrupting influence that religion has on the daily lives of billions. While that might be motivation for some, for me it looks very much like the religious evangelization that I have come to dislike.

I do not seek to “convert” anyone to atheism and I do not engage (as much as possible) in arguments for atheism unless dragged or provoked into it by someone. I’m an atheist because thats what’s fulfills me as a human being and not because of any sense of self-righteousness on my part. I believe that people should be free to believe in anything that they want to even if it involves fairies and leprechauns and I do wish that religious people had the same attitude of understanding when it comes to other belief systems. After all, does it take a stretch of imagination to go from angels and demons to elves?

I do think that atheists out there have a responsibility though. And that responsibility involves being more open about our atheism, about not hiding behind words like agnosticism and making the public more aware about what atheism means and what it means for them. After all the known enemy is better than the unknown (at least for religious fundamentalists). In the sublime words of Donald Rumsfeld, let us not be “unknown unknowns” but “unknown knowns” to start with and slowly make the transition to “known knowns”.

Lets make sure that there is enough material out there regarding transitions made by people from a religious belief system to atheism. Material which will serve as guideposts for people out there too confused and maybe also scared to make the transition on their own. Prominent people like Richard Dawkins and Christopher Hitchens have their part to play but so do we. At a smaller, grassroots level, we can take baby steps also to ensure that there is a support system that people can use. Especially for people who are letting go of any that they ever had.

Most importantly, keeping in mind that we do not ever want to be equated as an “Atheist Church”. Nearly all of us have arrived where we are through logical reasoning and introspection on our part. Proselytizing or evangelizing of any kind would just undermine the journey of any people who would care to join through such a drive.

I have collected some links that I think would of use to anyone interested in this topic. This page will be continually updated with new links and material, as and when I come across them.

Websites:
  • Why Won’t God Heal Amputees : Website examining systems of prayer and religion and refuting them through simple logical reasoning. Slightly Christian-focused but that might be because its an US website
  • Internet Infidels : Promoting a naturalistic worldview, namely “the hypothesis that the physical universe is a ‘closed system’ in the sense that nothing that is neither a part nor a product of it can affect it. So naturalism entails the nonexistence of all supernatural beings, including the theistic God.” Good reading material and references
  • Positive Atheism : Another website containing a lot of material and references for use by atheists and people stuck on the cusp. They promote activist atheism which should be self-explanatory to anyone
  • Richard Dawkins : The great grand-daddy of atheists out there in terms of visibility and activism. Site contains reading samples from his books as well a very active discussion forum on atheism. Great resource, highly recommended. Be prepared to lose a lot of your time on the site though (it’s that engaging!)
  • Atheism in India : The only good resource on Indian Atheism that I could come across. Web site collates material from over half a century of the Atheist Center’s existence. Based out of all places in Vijaywada, Andhra Pradesh. The official website is here
  • Flying Spaghetti Monster : A parody religion cooked (pun intended) by an activist in Kansas to protest against the inclusion of Intelligent Design as a theory in science textbooks in the state. Spread like wildfire across blogs and the news networs and now has its own approved Church and Bible.

Books:

  • The God Delusion : A distillation of Richard Dawkin’s work involving atheism and refuting the claims of intelligent design, its a great read for people like me. Might not bring smiles to the religious majority out there
  • The Blind Watchmaker : The book that really started it all for Richard Dawkins. An examination of evolution that puts down the argument for intelligent design cogently and decisively. A great read again, even for the religious right
  • A History of God : This is another book which really shook my core. Former nun Karen Armstrong examines the evolution of monotheism from its roots in paganism to its current avatar of devout bureaucracies. If this will not shake your questions about religion as a man-made construct, nothing else on this page will. Brilliant read.

There are some great books out there by Daniel Dennett and Christopher Hitchens also but I’ve focused on Dawkins as he seems to be more readily available here in India.

The atheistic difference is and should always be that it offers a path based on humanism and rationalism, not one based on the very tools and techniques that started pushing us away from the folds of our religious backgrounds in the first place.

Filed under: Society, , , , , , ,

Archives